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wheeliecool
Joined: 29 Mar 2010
Posts: 21
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 Posted: Thu Apr 01, 2010 10:12 am Post subject: Seriously thinking about it |
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Hi people. I've just signed up to this forum. I'm mid-thirties, Indian, and have a neuromuscular disability from birth (sorry, not quite ready to be too specific here!). Use a powerchair, live with a full-time PA. Have very little strength remaining anywhere, but will probably survive for another few years.
Never had a relationship, never had sex, never been kissed. Never had the ability to masturbate except on a few rare occasions in the distant past with the understanding of some carers. Been through university, and over a decade in my IT career, but never anything to encourage me that I could do anything to change this. Had utterly convinced myself that sex was for normal people and just tried to laugh it all off and console myself with the idea that my condition was deteriorating faster and I would only have to distract myself for a little while longer, until I died.
Then I made friends with a girl at work, she was clear with me that's all it would ever be, but I couldn't stop thinking about her. The whole thing just messed me up when I thought I had everything under control.
After a couple of months of being very depressed, I started to look for ways to identify the 'real' problems in my life and try to address them. This website (along with other influences) has led me to believe that I need to have a positive first sexual experience to "get the monkey off my back" and start to feel like a whole person.
So in the last few days I have been in touch with a lady listed on this site who has replied very positively. I think getting the support of my PA will not be a problem, even though telling him will feel weird. As my dad is so involved in my life, care and finances, keeping it from my parents will take some cunning on my part. But part of my "success" (hopefully) in making this happen will be in having a profound experience such as this in private from them, as privacy is something I do not take for granted.
I really hope I am going down the right path... |
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SensualSteve
Joined: 26 Oct 2009
Posts: 90
Location: NE Derbyshire
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| Posted: Thu Apr 01, 2010 8:24 pm Post subject: Re: Seriously thinking about it |
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Hi Wheelycool,
Welcome to the site. 
I think you are really brave to be so open about your situation and to devise something positive to do about it.
| wheeliecool wrote: | | Never had a relationship . . . . and just tried to laugh it all off . . |
I'm not going to muscle in on your post by telling you my story here - suffice to say that I understand what you are saying (I never managed to laugh it off - I just got gloomy).
I hope your liaison goes well. Best wishes.
Steve.
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wheeliecool
Joined: 29 Mar 2010
Posts: 21
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| Posted: Thu Apr 01, 2010 8:47 pm Post subject: |
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Thanks for the welcome Steve! Seems so quiet on this forum...
As for getting gloomy, it happened to me too, after years of laughing it off. In hindsight, this was always inevitable. Just took one person to show me that little bit more attention than I was used to, and I was ultimately consumed by my longing.
Told my PA of my decision today, and he was completely fine about it. Excited in fact! He was even enquiring about positions, got me a bit worried though as I can't see anything but lying straight on my back as being possible but he reckons the escort and I won't be able to achieve penetration that way. I really need to do some research! |
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Cazerella
Joined: 28 Mar 2010
Posts: 5
Location: London
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| Posted: Fri Apr 02, 2010 9:20 am Post subject: |
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| Quote: | | got me a bit worried though as I can't see anything but lying straight on my back as being possible but he reckons the escort and I won't be able to achieve penetration that way. I really need to do some research! |
Hello wheelie, obvously without knowing anything about you physically, its totally possible for penetrative sex to happen with fella lying on his back, in fact its one of my favs  - depending on how well you can tolerate weight the weight of another person on you, best thing is to discuss with the girl beforehand, its also possible for the lady to take her own weight on her legs (squatting). Obviously it means you are totally under the control of said lady . Also both lying on your side (spooning), best if you and the girl can discuss things, try things - work something out between you. I am sure you will have fun trying. Good luck.
Caz x |
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wheeliecool
Joined: 29 Mar 2010
Posts: 21
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| Posted: Fri Apr 02, 2010 10:30 am Post subject: |
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Hi Cazerella, thanks for the comments! I think the squatting thing sounds like the only realistic possibility. The encounter will be happening in my own room, on my single, fairly narrow bed. It's electrically adjustable and I have a special pressure-relief mattress that I'm uncomfortable without, so it's the only way. I think the spooning would need much more space and besides I wouldn't have the strength to thrust at all whether on my back or my side. I just need to be ridden
I still can't quite believe there is a forum for this kind of nonsense, whatever will they come up with next?!  |
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Cazerella
Joined: 28 Mar 2010
Posts: 5
Location: London
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| Posted: Fri Apr 02, 2010 10:50 am Post subject: |
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| Quote: | [quote="wheeliecool I just need to be ridden
I still can't quite believe there is a forum for this kind of nonsense, whatever will they come up with next?! |
[/quote]
ride em cowgirl....
There are sites dedicated to all sorts of inane and daft things, however, i believe this site exists because there is a real need. Sex and disability is often a taboo subject for society - Because mainstream society prefers not to deal with it, doesnt stop it from being important adding sexual frustration being added to the list of other demand(s) that people with disabilities face everyday - when my son gets older I will personally encourage him and pay for a lovely lady to put a smile on his face. Sex is a fundamental human right. You, my son and others with disabilities have as much right to experience the close contact of another human as anyone else.
Hugs
Caz xx
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Everyone is deserving of love, we are all expressions of one divine being. Do not look to others to see who you are, look within.... |
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pvctv
Joined: 12 Mar 2010
Posts: 15
Location: Central London
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wheeliecool
Joined: 29 Mar 2010
Posts: 21
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| Posted: Sat Apr 03, 2010 9:03 pm Post subject: |
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| Well yeah, I know you know I was only joking... It's strange though, I actually feel something akin to guilt on the rare occasions I feel any physical pleasure. Even just enjoying a hot shower on my skin, it's like I shouldn't be feeling that. I don't know why that is. I'm hoping that by paying significant money for pleasure, it's as much a justification to myself to accept the pleasure without guilt, as it is to simply compensate the girl for her efforts. |
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nwalker78
Joined: 07 Sep 2008
Posts: 47
Location: Medway Towns
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| Posted: Mon Apr 05, 2010 10:12 am Post subject: |
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hi there mate,
firstly welcome to the board, imho you have overcome te biggset hurdle. i myself ave a servere type fshmd and like you have extreme limited strength and mobility. and use a profiling bed with a ric matress.
i am also limited to a case of girl ontop but this hasnt stopped me, all can say is be paitent and if things dnt wrk as you expect straight away dnt give up, it can take time to build trust with the lady your seeing and to know what u can an cant do but believe me finding out is half the fun.
ive had a couple of bad experiences but the god ones far out weigh the bad.
just relax, have fun be yourself. if you have concerns discuss them with the lady and although its difficult be open, if sommet dnt feel rifght at the time say so.... only you know your body and its limits.
i now know a ceeling track hoist hass several uses other than what it was intnded for lol.
but most of all if you hve any questions we are here anddont judge.
stay safe and have fun
nw |
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wheeliecool
Joined: 29 Mar 2010
Posts: 21
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| Posted: Fri Apr 23, 2010 7:35 pm Post subject: |
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| Well, just over 48 hours to go, then into the breach - gulp! Wish me luck! Just confirmed everything with my chosen lady who was charming and patient on the phone. Looking forward to the experience and getting that "carnal knowledge" but my god, the anxiety is huge right now. Thought I'd convinced myself this was all just a bit of harmless fun, but somehow it just feels like nothing will ever quite be the same again... |
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nwalker78
Joined: 07 Sep 2008
Posts: 47
Location: Medway Towns
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| Posted: Fri Apr 23, 2010 7:40 pm Post subject: |
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| good luk and relax mate nothing to b concerned about. |
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pvctv
Joined: 12 Mar 2010
Posts: 15
Location: Central London
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exeterjohn
Joined: 21 Apr 2010
Posts: 1
Location: Devon
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| Posted: Sun Apr 25, 2010 9:53 am Post subject: New boy |
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Hello all. I have just joined a few days ago and this is my first post. I am an older (but still capable) man and I have no idea how to go about offering something desirable to a woman in my area.
All suggestions welcome.
John |
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SensualSteve
Joined: 26 Oct 2009
Posts: 90
Location: NE Derbyshire
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| Posted: Sun Apr 25, 2010 4:56 pm Post subject: Re: New boy |
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| exeterjohn wrote: | Hello all. I have just joined a few days ago and this is my first post. I am an older (but still capable) man and I have no idea how to go about offering something desirable to a woman in my area.
All suggestions welcome.
John |
Hi John,
Welcome to TLC.
I'm guessing that you are not too familiar with forums and message boards, is that correct?
What you have just posted is totally different from everything else in this topic, so it should have been posted as a new topic.
No problem. My suggestion:
Copy your text into a new topic, then come back and delete this one. Problem solved!
Hope you enjoy being on TLC!
Steve.
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Erotic Pampering & Sensual massage for ladies. |
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wheeliecool
Joined: 29 Mar 2010
Posts: 21
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| Posted: Tue Apr 27, 2010 11:08 am Post subject: |
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Hi folks, just a quick note to say everything went to plan My one-hour with Jemma in my own bedroom was lovely and she put me at ease straight away. A little technical hitch with my temperamental electric bed did put the kibosh on one of my major goals for the evening unfortunately so I have this nagging feeling I'm going to want to try this again in the future!
Thanks to you guys on this forum for the encouragement. I'm happy to be PM'd if anyone wants to know anything further! |
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